January 2012
goals for 2012
get food poisoning and die
forced to go to a family friends party to celebrate new years eve…
no new years resolution because i will probably kill myself on the car ride there <3
girl: i'm pansexual
me: what's that?
girl: it means that i would date anyone... gay, straight, lesbian, bi, trans... etc..
me: doesn't that mean ur just desperate
friend: i got an A on my calculus test
friend: i got a hot boyfriend
friend: i had so much fun partying this weekend
me: one time i got four notes on a text post i made
princeofpancakes:
what kind of pussy does the pope get?
nun
blaine-anderson:
i wonder if tom hanks just writes “t hanks” in his thank you cards like it’s a message and signature all in one
niggernest:
radiobread4:
queenqueefs:
people who use the word orgasmic
hello
sly dig at u not cool
walking into a white girl at school
me: sorry
her: omg it's ok don't worry things happen
walking into a black girl at school
me: sorry
her: BITCH WHAT THE FUCK WATCH WHERE THE FUCK YOU'RE GOING I WENT THROUGH FUCKIN SLAVERY I DON'T DESERVE THIS SHIT FUCKIN WHITE PEOPLE WHAT THE FUCK BITCH HOE NIGGA
pugsexual:
HD porn is so clear that you can actually see how disappointed their parents are
i wish the ball would drop on my house
wwiao:
my new years resolution is to get really hot omg
me: *walks in a starbucks*
clerk: hello how can i hlep u
me: i want a starbucks
clerk: ok sure these are the different kinds of coff-
me: NO
me: I
me: WANT
me: A
me: STARBUCKS
me: THE
me: WHOLE
me: BUILDING
bigtimerussian:
rewearing the same outfit you wore yesterday because no one saw you yesterday
Americans: Not enough cheese in my cheesy breadsticks
Africans: Please give me water
BAFNY
boring ass fucken new years/
70percentwater asked: Carla I hope that you have fun tonight wherever you go/whatever you do, and I hope that you know how much I LOVE you! I hope that 2012 is going to be your very best year ever!!!! <3 Nikki
December 2011
deficiency
; is the only thing that i can really depend on.
at the end of the day we can always find something to sob about or smile to; the choice is yours, you see
girl: wow i seriously hate two faced people
nearby are conjoined twins, who silently weep together upon overhearing
Just because you can push up your saggy boobies,...
ori0n-pax:
know this.
